Wednesday, 07 May 2008

Honest Blogging.... To Be Or Not To Be...?

I get so excited about the ideas I have, bloggin ideas.  Things I wonder about, and which I want to discuss.

But then I never get to put pen to paper, or fingers to keyboard. 

This blog STILL isn't home yet.  I miss my previous blog a lot.  This one just seems a bit dead.  But after I found out about my husband reading the other blog I dont know, I'm just not comfortable about blogging there anymore.  Maybe its cause he teases me about being a geek.  And maybe it baring my soul on the net that frightens me.  I dont know.

Its not like I'm keeping secrets from him really, sharing them on my blog instead.  He knows all there is to know about me - much more than I'm willing to blog about, but still.  I guess perhaps its just a mental block.

My husband is VERY old fashioned, and VERY conservative when it comes to the www.  He doesn't like facebook, and I guess blogging freaks him out?  He doesn't like the idea of me sharing my life with 'strangers', and at the same time sharing parts of his live, inevitably.

Argh... I wish I could just look PAST this and carry on.  As if nothing had happened.  I should probably talk to him about it, but I dread discussing something which I know he feels so strong about.

Still I am not going to give up blogging.  I'm loving it.  I've been blogging for about 3 years now, and I'm addicted in a way.  I find it great stimulation for my thoughts, and I find that I actually  get rid of some things that bother me.  When I'm angry with someone I just need to do a post about it.  I hardly ever make it public.  Still I put my thoughts on black and white, and after that I'm usually ready to fogive and forget.

Besides all that, I love writing.  I may not be exceptionally great at it, but I enjoy it.  I've always loved it.  I've even considered studying further, something like creative writing, but taking up a career with that would be a waste.  I hate being forced to write about something I have no passion for.  Same way with art.  I had art lessons at school, and I hated when we were forced to draw something specific.  I love being creative, but on my own, in my own way.

Yesterday and today I've been at home.  I'm off sick with flu and UTI, though I'm feeling better today, I still have a bit of a fever - my digital thermometer makes a beeping sound whenever I take my temperature, and can't go any higher - lol.  I'll be back at work again tomorrow, though I won't have finished my antibiotics by then.  Oh well, just two days of work, and then its weekend again, hey!?  Nice.   And there I was, thinking it was going to be a long work week.

I might write again a bit later, but for now I want to get back in bed, and read my book.  I've been reading quite a lot, but I absolutely love it.  I haven't read in quite a while, and I don't know how I'm going to stop myself...

I hope you all are having a pleasant week.  Take care, till later.

Posted by Anonymous at 13:51:14 | Permanent Link | Comments (2) |